senzacni( copacetic in Czech, HOW COOL IS THAT????)

Dnes (Today) ja(I) climbed a mountain, a(and) NE(no) Nejsem (I am not) mluveni(speaking) metaphorically.
ja (I) literally climbed a mountain. It was velky(big) a(and) steep, just ask moje (my) noha(legs)- they'll tell tobe(you), oni(they) felt to(it), OH Ano(yes) they did.

It was an amazing hike- ale(but) as I sit tady(here) right ted(now), I've realized that whether or not my body will be able to emerge from postel(bed) in the rano(morning) is debatable- i might have to roll out of bed onto the floor, and slowly stand nahore(up) from tam(there). I guess ja budu ( I will) find out zitra rano ( tomorrow morning).

Okay enough with the Czech, I'm sure that's annoying to read (cist) haha.

I have to say though i'm awfully proud of my Czech, I text my friends in czech, send them e-mails in czech, I read books in Czech although I don't understand them it helps me with pronounciation which isn't the easiest thing- but according to my host mom my pronounciation is very good- I sound like a czech speaker she tells me, and claims she thinks I have an ear for languages. Now I don't know if she is just trying to give me hope, or if she is serious. But if it's only to give me hope, it works just great.

I went shopping yesterday at the mall, and all I came home with was an avocado, but I couldn't have been happier. There is a grocery store at the mall, incase you were confused. Well you see, I was craving an avocado, and I still had about half of my weekly allowance I've put myself on left- so I bought an avocado. Now this was the biggest avocado I've ever eaten, and also the most expensive.....$1.50 for an AVOCADO!!!! But as long as I only buy one every once in awhile it will be okay, it's not like I buy them everyday, but I think it would be okay if, say, I wanted one once a month, I think I can budget my $1.50 avocado into my allowance just fine.

Last night I laid in bed an requested information from about 12 colleges in the United States...and all that information will be in my room waiting for me when I get home- and I can sift through it and figure out where in the heck I'm going to end up furthering my education.

I will be getting information from:
New York University
Columbia
Fordham
Brown
Dartmouth
University of Washington
Reed
Boston University
Cornell
Yale
Harvard
Georgetown
that's all.

Then I'm also looking into schools in Canada:
University of British Columbia
and possibly Mcgill

and then there is Charles University in Prague- which for some reason I keep reverting back to, but we'll see. It's just an option- like the rest.

You know I always thought of senior year as a stressful year, you're finishing one thing( high school) while at the same time you are preparing for another(college)- but for some reason I do believe I will have it under control. It will only be stressful if I allow it to be- so maybe I'll just put my foot down now, and save myself stress later.

You know, it's kind of funny because I said climbing the mountain wasn't metaphoric, but in a sense it kind of was. I started at the bottom, and kept going and going and going- even when it got really hard- I kept going, until I reached the top. And at the top this feeling of accomplishment washed over me.
I came to the Czech Republic at the bottom of that hill, and as time passes here, as I grow and learn and experience, I am making my way towards the top. At the top lies disovery of myself and what path I will be taking in this life- so the longer I'm here the closer I am to getting there. And I do believe that before I return home- I will have reached the top. I will be in tune with who I am, content in my own skin, confident in my knowledge, my beliefs, my potential- and with a rather good idea of where I want life to take me.

So I may have literally climbed a mountain today- reached the top,
but I'm still climbing my metaphoric mountain- and I've got plenty of time before I reach the top- but I'll keep climbing...because it's worth it.
So ask yourself, " What will you climb a mountain for?"
Place that goal, ambition you have at the top your mountain- and start climbing, because when you get to the top...well.....you'll see.

Cau

Freistadt, Austria

That would be where I spent my evening, and it was quite the evening.

I'll start out with a little preface however
I've been awake since 3:30 a.m., my host sister who is two woke up crying with a horrible stomach ache, and the crying went on and on- and I never ended up going back to sleep.

School was good however, during Art History I worked on my Czech, and then conversed more today in Czech, and had others speak to me in it as well. Slowly but surely I'm getting rid of English- so far so good.
No more english music
no english television
no english reading ( well except e-mails of course, but it's not my fault people I know don't speak Czech)

So Austria. The foreign exchange student there was from South Africa, and we had really good conversation.

But there was one person in particular that stuck out to me from the start of the evening, it was something about the way he was able to sit back and observe and listen- without having to be directly involved in the conversation.

However, because it was me, I was curious to know his story, so I brought him into the conversation, and this is what I found out.

He is from England, born and raised. His wife came to England, they fell in love
(she is Austrian) they went to Austria one summer and have been there ever since. That was 33 years ago. He is an artist, a painter. Of course after 33 years his German is flawless, and he can carry on quite the conversation.

It was very nice, after not having an indepth conversation with someone over the age of 18 for over a month- to finally have one.
We talked about several things, yet typically the questions came up, "Why the Czech Republic?" or "What do you plan on doing with Czech?"
and so I told him about my goal,
about Charles University- and it was in voicing that goal, that I realized it really is something I'm working towards,
and it was the smile that spread across his face as I shared my plan with him,
and the words he had for me after that let me see how possible it all is.
How this goal I'm working towards is in my reach, all I have to do is grab for it.

And perhaps I'm crazy, although I don't think so, but ever since I've set this goal my Czech seems to be coming easier, my speaking more freqent, my understanding more clear. It's rather inspiring, and it keeps me going along the the hard but worthy road to fluency.

The South African leaves in January to go back home, so we talked tonight about how we're changing. Change this, and change that. And maybe the rest of you can see the changes in me, but I don't see them. To me, I'm still the same person, I'm growing, learning, experiencing- but I'm still me, and I don't think I'm going to notice the change in myself until I return home- and then I think I will see it.
This is who I am in the "now" so I believe it will take going back to old stomping ground to see who I was and who I've become.
It's not something to look forward to or anticipate, yet it's not something to dread either. It's just simply one of those things that's going to happen.

And Simon and Garfunkel( Garfunkle? I dont know) well they are new friends of mine, and to think that a Czech introduced me to them, but they will forever remind me of the trip to Austria, and the internal breakthrough that occured due to conversation with a British German speaking Austrian married artist.

LIVE.
and do it for you.

Streda( middle) which to you means Wednesday

Today was super busy- and I'm exhausted. But it's the good exhaustion.

First I got up at five a.m., mind you not because I wanted to, but for some reason my body decided it was done resting and could go back to living. whatever, I disagree. I needed more rest.

I left the house early and rode my bike to school, because...

for P.E. today we went on a 20 km bike ride by the castle, so that's like about 12.8 miles, it was fun- I practiced using my Czech with my friends while riding- It was a win-win situation.

I then went to my two english classes, and school was over.

I rode my bike home, visited with my host mom, and left for Czech lessons.

After Czech lessons I went to a pub with a boy from my class, some girl, and the other three exchange students.

I went home for an hour- the boy from my class texted me telling me he left his cigarettes at the pub, and that it's my fault because I always tell him that it's bad for him.

Anyways then I left and went to the rotary meeting- which drained the already tired me, as I sat for two hours listening to Czech and pulling meaning from what I could pick up on and understand.

Tomorrow will be just as busy
I have Art History at 7
which means I have to get up at five
because I have to leave the house at 6:30
and after school I have to go buy my host sister something for her birthday
and then maybe go to a kavarna ( cafe) with one of my friends
and then at 5 I have to meet the rotary people because they are taking us to Austria
and I probably won't get home until midnight.

And it's strange here, because at home it always seemed like the school week passed so slow- but here ( probably since I'm not really doing anything in school) each week just flies by. It could slow down a bit, I wouldn't mind.

okay off to unwind.

Cau

Entertaining Thoughts...

thinking is something I do a lot of these days,

and since arriving in this country I've pondered whether or not going to University in the United States is what I'm supposed to do.

There is a whole world out there, and why not go here?

or somewhere else?

Charles University in Prague is something I've been looking into.

the small yet minor issue is that although they do offer certain programs in English, they are limited.

Your options as a Czech speaker, are much wider.
But this is the deal, if you will study at the University in Czech, you must take the entrance exams in Czech.

This means that I then have the time that I'm here, as well as the following school year to be entirely fluent in the language. It would be no easy feat, yet it is not impossible.

It looks like a challenge to me. Am I exactly sure it's what I want to do? No

would it hurt to shoot for it? absolutely not.

and in the end, if I decide against it, I'll have added a language to my list.
no harm done.

There are so many options out there, that I had allowed myself to be blind to. And it's as though all at once I saw the big picture- and I'm trying to process and take in what I've seen.

I'm digesting information, searching for more, and looking to find the university that's calling my name.

Before I know it- I'll be in University. I can't wait to find out where life will land me.

Where's your destination?
Do you know?
If not, it's alright, you've got time.
Go where life leads you.

It's a Strange thing...

Being missed, that is.

because it seems to me, that as human beings we are always missed at the wrong times, missed when there is no chance of us making an appearance of coming back,

yet when we are readily available- we're not missed. For it would seem that simply the knowledge that we are there, should we be needed, is enough.

Yet when we are finally gone, and someone turns to us, only to see that we are no longer there, only then are we missed.

Funny how that works. Yet in truth it is how we all operate.

It's strange how distance brings some people closer, and how it tears some apart.
It's one of those things in life that can either be for the better or the worse. Not both, like marriage is supposed to be.

Upon having the opportunity to appreciate the people in our lives- we generally pass it up.
Naturally we do so on the designated days, their birthdays, mother's day, father's day- but those are forced- so unatural, their signifigance miniscule.

And that is how I've realized a lot of things about myself.

My life mainly consists of people I appreciate. If I am uncapble of appreciating someone for one reason or another, they cease to exist within my undguarded box.

I make it awfully clear that I appreciate people as well- and I never seem to grow tired of doing so- although I do believe at times my appreciation is the only thing that keeps people around.

I was in English class the other day, and the teacher asked me a question I was less than prepared to answer,

she turned to me and said "what do you stand for?"
she asked it as plain as day, as though she had simply how many fingers I had, as though it was no big deal.

I have never once been asked that question, and it's a question I didn't have a readily available answer to.
But I've thought a lot since then, and in the event that I should ever be asked that again- the person inquiring within, better be prepared for what it is I have to say.

I'm currently reading a book and it states, " Once in awhile you have to weigh what you want against what you believe in."

and this i believe is true- as I have done it.

Yet I am also as equally guilty of letting what I want outweigh what I believe in.

I think we are all guilty of both. It's called being human beings.

So what do I stand for?
would you like a slight glimpse into the person that is I?

I stand for truth. I trust people in way that one might consider "too easily"- once gaining my trust you have all of it. However, in the event that you break that trust it is gone, and we must build it back up from the surface, which takes time because naturally I'm more guarded the second time around. I'd be stupid not to be.

I stand for detail. the small things, that many find unsignificant, those are the things that mean something to me. I know the things about people, that most observers are blind to- and in being observant to those things I am let into a part of people that most remain closed off to.

I stand for giving. Not things you can buy, not anything worth dollar value, those things in my eyes are worthless, they can be replaced. I give the things of which only one exist in this world, what I give cannot be replicated, reproduced. I give the things that you'll remember.

I stand for self worth. A wise woman by the name Katherine Whey once stated, " You can explore the universe looking for somebody who is more deserving of your life and affection that you are yourself, and you will not find that person anywhere." And that wise woman is exactly right. Person number one is always of first importance. I'm not speaking in the matter of selfishness, yet in care and concern. You have to worry about yourself, before taking it upon yourself to worry about others.

I stand for the struggle to the top. I want to work for all I get in life, I want to work hard, I want there to be days when all I want to do is quit. I want to feel from time to time like I'm making the smallest difference, like my work is not good enough- because when I get to the top, when I reach that goal, the feeling for it will be one well deserved. I had to work to get to this country. I had to sit in a room and sell myself, which is not the easiest thing to do. I had to sit under the watchful eye of two women I had just met, as I had to form answers to difficult questions..." In the given event that someone in your host country is bashing the United States, how will you respond"
and other questions that required tact and thought when prepairing answers,
I had to refrain from admitting that I would probably join in bashing it with them, as after all I was going as a representative of that country,
yet I had to make sure I included that ofcourse their thoughts and ideas would be respected.
One of two women wore spectacles and kept eyeing me over the top of them, as they were scooted all the way down her nose, and as I provided my answers to her several questions she looke unsatisfied with all I had to say.
Yet I didn't allow myself to waver, or lose nerve. I knew my opinions, my ideas, and I was not about to resign myself to taking it down a notch, and allowing the true me to take a back seat.
They would either accept me for who I was, and what I had to offer, or they wouldn't.
In the end I will of have worked towards one answer or the other- but it would have been myself that got me there.
I got me here- and the feeling that comes from that, well, it's one I'd like to continously feel throughout my life.

and I stand for more, yet you can't type out the innerds of a person. not all of them anyways.

On an entirely different note, my host mom was going through this book this morning, and she looks up and asks me,

" Do you know Yosemite?"
and I started laughing really really hard,
because of all the questions she could have asked
I do believe that was the last I expected

Do I know Yosemite???? OH DO I!
thoughts of BOO BOO bear whose name had been forgotten for hours-
and had been substituted with DOO DOO, which I insisted was all wrong,
soggy cold dinner from the rain,
and looking at the un-set up tent as though we'd never seen one before.
I think I know Yosemite.

Anyways I thought that a rather funny way to start my morning.

Yesterday turned out to be an amazing day. I met my friends around noon and we took the train to a neighboring town by the name of Ceske Krumlov, which some consider the most beautiful town in the Czech Republic. I haven't seen all of the Czech Republic so I can't make that claim although it was very beautiful.

We went to the wax museum- which was rather neat. It's not like our lame one's at home whic include celebraties, OH NO. this was a historical wax museum- with people of importance, people that made a difference. Not just people that make tabloids.

We then went to the torture museum--- and viewed very unpleasant methods of being killed.

We went to lunch.

and then we went to go tour the castle, which we didn't have to pay to get into because our friend works there as a tour guide and let us in for free. YES that's right my friend is a castle tour guide- at age 17. I wish I could work here, sadly I can't.

My friends also find it rather impressive at how much of what they say I can pick up on and understand, although I don't know what all the fuss is, I really don't understand much.

But it's coming. I keep telling myself that anyways.

Alright go LIVE.
make something of your day, of your life,
and in case no one has ever asked you,
"What do you stand for?"
If you don't know, figure it out.

Copacetic

I don't know what's become of my life.

Wait. no. That's a lie.

I know exactly what's become of it- but for the most part it is all beyond my comprehension.

Yesterday we went on a field trip to Germany.
This is what happened- I realized that I hadn't brought my passport, because I guess it hadn't registered that Oh I don't know, WE WERE GOING OUT OF THE COUNTRY- AND I'M A FOREIGNER.

So the head lady at school was like well you can risk it and go with us- but if they stop us at the border and won't let you through we will have to leave you at the border and pick you back up when we leave.
She ended mind you by saying "I'd risk it"

And her was my train of thought---Either I'd have a story about spending the day in Germany, or I'd have a story about spending the day on the German border, either way it was worth it to me- so I went- to Germany PASSPORT- LESS

and got in, and enjoyed my day in Zweisel, Germany very much.

Okay now get this-
Saturday I'm taking the train with friends to go to Prague to go shopping.
Yep, no more Pioneer Square, Clackamas, Washington Square, nope, these days I go to Prague to do my shopping. WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN? WHEN DID THIS BECOME MY LIFE?

Because often here, I sit back- and am like WOAH- so this is my life.

Oh and next Thursday night I'm going to Austria- I'm not quite sure why- I just know I'm going.

Oh and I am taking these free Czech lessons three days a week
on top of the two hours provided by the school
so that is EIGHT HOURS of learning Czech each week
on top of the fact that I'm contstantly hearing the language everywhere I go, at school, at home, with friends, on my ipod, on television.
SO I guess you could call me a Czech addict, but if I want to be fluent by the end of this---it sure isn't going to happen without work.

okay I'm exhausted, and there are pictures of the field trip I'd like to put on here- but I can't because they have me in them, and if you're not in the Czech you don't see the pictures. You'll just have to wait for awhile. Or I guess a long while. I suppose it depends on how you want to look at it.

Get out there and live my friends,
because otherwise you're just wasting perfectly good time.

Germany

Ok so first things first. We got wireless internet yesterday so now the internet works in my room.

which means that I can now add pictures to my blogs.

Which I've already done to several of my previous blogs----SO GO LOOK!

Also I came to the conclusion that for the remainder of my stay here you will not view any pictures of me.

Yes, you heard right. No pictures of me- that way the difference in my appearance will be quite the shocker when I come home.

Last night I went to cycling again with my host mom- I have to admit it wasn't quite the ass kicking as it was the first time- and this time I kept my eyes off the clock, and the time seemed to pass rather fast.

Tonight we are going to Aerobics

Wednesday I have P.E. for two hours, ( last week we played volleyball, Breegan you would have been proud- I'm not all that bad)

and the rest of the week I will go running.

I went shopping yesterday after school----and GUESS what store they have here.

H&M- be jealous husband, be jealous. Although I guess I shouldn't have been surprised they have it here- after all it is a Swedish store.

Anyways I bought this little black dress- well because I tried it on, in a size smaller than normal and it fit really well, and then the fact that it was on sale. Well that kind of sold me.

Haha and then because I wasn't paying attention- I got on the bus going the wrong direction- and rode it all the way to the last stop.

So then I just got off and turned around- it was no big deal.

Okay off to go get ready- field trip to Germany today, which I'm rather excited for.